Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
