can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
