I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
tell me about the fingering
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
