"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
