i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize