Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
