i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
