why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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