She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
