i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
