I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
