do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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