where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
