I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize