So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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