you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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