Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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