No more Irish car bombs ever.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
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