in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
