3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
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