My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
