hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
