No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
