normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
