I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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