Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
