I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Im part way to drunk.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize