so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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