I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
