I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
i think my cat just said my name.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
