i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
