Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize
