I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
