ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
