i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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