At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize