that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
