He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize