Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
