id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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