Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
