I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
