It's like God shit irony all over that family
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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