Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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