Who did Billy Mays play for?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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