in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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