Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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