Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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