im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize