Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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